Imagine a game that never got started, where no-one looked like they'd come out of the dressing room. Add lots of wind and rain. Add strikers that couldn't score in the proverbial. Add schoolboy stuff like two of them going for the same ball. Repeatedly.

Sir Les missed an absolute sitter and it was all downhill from then on in. The forwards for both teams had a competition as to who could get closest to the corner flag with their "shots" and Jordan Stewart won when his went out for a throw in. He had a very poor game and heaven knows why Micky left him on.

Nikos Dabizas got his first start and did ok considering he had no idea who he was playing next to. Did what he had to do a few times and only made a couple of dodgy clearances or missed tackles. Match fitness and working out what the hell the rest of our defence are playing at half the time and he should be fine.

Muzzy got stuck in and tried to lead by example. And of course got a yellow for his efforts. Most of them didn't look with it, Impey got caught too many times, and we passed to no-one several times. Thankfully Saints had just as bad a game. It had 0-0 written all over it.

We were grateful when the full time whistle went and put us out of our misery, so we really don't want to relive it anymore, thank you.

Surely even Gordon Strachan will struggle to find anything remotely amusing to say about this sad exceuse for a Premiership game?